“I am Daniel Rego, and I can’t get over my Demonic addiction.”

A recent picture of Daniel Rego.

Amongst our many services, metalwikileaks runs the Metalheads Mnemonymous (MMn). MMn is a place where we help people get over their metal addiction. We’ve had many famous inmates at our help center including people like Ratan Tata, Al Mumin, Dave Mustard Stain, Riju Dasgupta, Riju Dasgupta and many more. Last week, things got a bit sexually tense when a new inmate, Daniel Rego joined the many metalheads looking for hope.

Metalheads Mnemonymous secret handshake. Don’t try this at home.

 

Daniel: Hi friends, I am Daniel and I am still can’t get over Demonic Resurrection.

 

Everyone: Hi Daniel!

 

Daniel: It’s been over a week and I cans still feel my hand tremble in sixteen notes.  

 

Husain: I know the feels Bro. Brogaine. Brogramme. Brovine. Brocin.

 

Daniel: Thanks bro. how do I get over these feeling? It haunts me in my sleep and in the wakefulness. I can see the Demonstealer in the clouds when I look towards the sky. Yesterday, I saw him as coffee art in my discounted cup of cappuccino at café café day!

 

“Count Varathora”: Have you tried wearing a black cloak man. It has helped me BIG time.

 

Ashish: Or start your own music shop.

 

Daniel: But, but… you guys have found your own ting man. I can’t even keep my nose closed without smelling Demonstealer’s epic Bacon thingamajigs!

 

Prashant: Flee the country. It helps. America perhaps?

 

JP: You got something thing to smoke or what? What? What are you guys looking at me like that for? This is Metalheads Mnemonymous, not Demonstealer’s home! I am sure I can smoke here.

 

Daniel: Yeah man, I got some here. I have tryed all drugs the I can. PCP. Methadone. FP. Acid. I can’t seem to get over my main poblem – My Demonstealer addiction.

 

Yash: What is FP yo. I would like a hit of that!

 

Daniel: Frozen Portrait.

 

Yash: Oh… Oh.. ahem.. oh. Ooh. Okaaaaaaaaaayyyyy. Oh. Ahem. Yeaah. Ohk. K k. I am cool. I am cool. May the sun lord singe me with Vitamin D for even thinking that.

 

Rahul: Hey Daniel. Have you tried an jazz?

 

Daniel: Dude, you are using an article where it isn’t required man. Stop doing that.

A picture of Daniel Rego during a less complicated time.

 

(The rest of the members of this self-help group could not come that day due to traffic at the Kala Nagar Flyover.)

Riju Dasgupta starts own bakery, Sahil Makhija unlikes Albatross page on Facebook

One may say that being just an indie musician, and a metal musician at that, is not enough for most. There is the biting need to do a little extra, even if said extra is not required and can often hamper the original goal; like that extra extended outro in that Something Relevant song, “Every Something relevant song”.

There have been quite a few musicians in the Indian scene that have taken to doing more than just playing in their band. Sahil Makhija of Demonic resurrection runs Headbanger’s kitchen and answers questions on Ask.FM, Undying inc.’s Shashank Bhatnagar runs his very own Cafe and uploads daily profile pictures, and Goddess Gagged’s Arman Menzies takes topless pictures of himself in Goa.

To keep up with the anti trend of taking up a hobby centred around food, Riju Dasgupta of metal band, Albatross, have started his very own bakery, the aptly titled- Coven Fresh.

We spoke to Dasgupta about his new venture.

“I have always wanted to open my own bakery. I have always wanted to have a bun in my oven. Coven Fresh is my fourth baby, after Albatross, Primitiv, and Facebook. I bake, cook, boil, and pack. Coven Fresh is all me, promise. In time, I plan to have all kinds of dessert and other baked goods for sale. For now I only have two items on sale. You could call them bakery EPs.”

Metal Wikileaks visited Coven Fresh and managed to take a pictures of what was up for sale. Here is an exclusive reveal of Coven Fresh’s goods.

Riju Dasgupta is already out vigorously promoting his new venture. This is him giving handouts at the last Albatross gig.

Due to legal reasons, we are unable to detail give you details on the supposed scuffle between Sahil Makhija and Dasgupta post the latter starting Coven Fresh. We will be back as soon as our Facebook newsfeed is clear of all of his 100 days of happy bullshit.